50cent
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Halle Berry?s Guys Choice Awards Speech (Makes Out With Jamie Foxx)
Full Article: http://ping.fm/UpTTR
Astrological After-sex Comments
Astrological After-sex Comments
Aries: "Okay, let's do it again!" <<<<<YUMM YUMM
Taurus: "I'm hungry pass the pizza."
Gemini: "Have you seen the remote?"
Cancer: "When are we getting married?"
Leo: "Wasn't I fantastic?" <<<<<Yup one nighter Oh yeah
Virgo: "I need to wash the sheets." <<<<<<<<<Married, MOVING ON
Libra: "I liked it if you liked it." <<<<<RUNNNNNNNNNNNN
Scorpio: "Perhaps I should untie you." <<<<< NOOOOOOOOOOOO
Sagittarius: "Don't call me I'll call you." <<<<<GRRRRRRRRRRRR
Capricorn: "Do you have a business card?"
Aquarius: "Now let's try it with our clothes off!"
Pisces: "What did you say your name was again?" <<<<<<lol Go Pisce
On the menu
On the menu
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
---------------------------------
Cheese Sandwich $ 1.50
Chicken Sandwich $ 2.50
Hand Job $10.00
---------------------------------
Checking his wallet he finds one single ten dollar bill.
He walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.
"Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?"
"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"
"Yes", she purrs, "indeed I am!"
The man replies "Well go wash your hands, I want a cheese sandwich!"
How many babies?
How many babies?
Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room while their wives were in labor. The nurse arrived and proudly announced to the first man, "Congratulations, sir. You're the father of twins!"
"What a coincidence! I work for the Minnesota Twins Baseball team!"
Later the nurse returned and congratulated the second father on the birth of his triplets.
"Wow! That's incredible! I work for the 3M Corporation."
An hour later, the nurse returned to congratulate the third man on the
birth of his quadruplets. Stunned, he barely could reply, "I don't believe it! I work for the Four Seasons Hotel!"
After this, everyone turned to the fourth guy who had just fainted. The nurse rushed to his side. As he slowly gained consciousness, they could hear him mutter over and over, "I should never have taken that job at 7-Eleven. I should never have taken that job at 7-Eleven. I should never have taken that job...."
Scotsman at a baseball game
Scotsman at a baseball game
A Scottish tourist attended his first baseball game in the US and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring "Run....Run!"
The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya!"
A third batter hits a slam and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya!"
The next batter steadfastly holds his swing four times and as the ump calls a walk the Scotsman stands up and yells "R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run!"
All the surrounding fans giggle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment, whispers to the Scotsman, "He doesn't have to run, he's got four balls."
After this explanation the Scotsman stands up in disbelief and screams, "Walk with pr-r-ride man! Walk with pr-r-ride!!!!
Answering Machine...
Now I lay me down to sleep; Leave a message at the beep. If I
should die before I wake, remember to erase the tape.
Quotes...
A computer terminal is not some clunky old television with a
typewriter in front of it. It is an interface where the mind
and body can connect with the universe and move bits of it
about. (from Mostly Harmless) - Douglas Adams
Sunday, June 21, 2009
THISIS50.COM TOUR
